Making Sevilly Assumptions

When I was in Seville I wondered if the oranges covering the pavements and parks were a national strategy to increase vitamin C in homeless people. Just blow away the dirt, peel and enjoy. But then I looked up and saw the oranges dropped from trees. I am not sure if anyone eats them. Maybe they are simply decoration or food for the insects.

This might not have been akin to Isaac Newton's discovery of universal gravitation by observing an apple falling from a tree. However, it conveys how easy it is to jump to conclusions when you do not have the full picture.

When I was running the marathon on the Sunday, a blind old man with a walking cane was gauging when it was safe to cross the road. It just had to be me, didn’t it! Well, not just me. We all laughed as he determined our pace was not a threat to his safety. Good for him.

I was sitting in the VIP Lounge of Seville Airport, listening to a couple talk about a heated conversation they witnessed in the check-in queue. “That posh bloke didn’t budge when the lady had a go at him for letting his friends join him in the queue,” said the husband.

“No,” said his wife, “she was very upset, didn’t think it was fair. He was very superior in his attitude. Very posh.”

I created a picture in my mind of what these poshos were like, built on “their one rule for us” articulation of their behaviour.

I was flying club class, happy to pay a little bit extra for the benefits that come with sitting that side of the curtain. A passenger decided to share his thoughts while he walked past our seats. “Pay all that extra money for an extended armrest. That’s all you get.”

I know it wasn’t personal but he said it out loud because he wanted to indirectly insult the people sitting in those “rip off seats”. I am not invisible and the person who said that probably earns more than I do, ran the Seville Marathon far quicker than I did and has loads of cool videos and photos from his holiday on his socials.

You can keep all that stuff. I will keep my extended armrest where I can put my drinks when I have my tasty airplane meal. Paying more for Express check-in is worth it. The Gatwick club lounge is a nice place to chill, eat and drink. On the plane, shorter queues for the toilet and getting off the plane quickly are worth it, even if you wait with everyone else for your luggage.

I was sitting adjacent to a nervy dad with a face mask who was thrilled when a posh bloke two rows up agreed to swap places with him so he could sit with his wife and baby. I wonder if people who wear face masks to stop germs would prioritise wearing it over using an oxygen mask if the plane was in difficulties.

Anyway, posh bloke’s new neighbour said, “That was such a nice thing to do, to give up your seat to allow them to sit together.”

“Funny you should say that,” said posh bloke. “A couple of hours ago a woman was shouting at me for letting my friend join me in the queue. When people are aggressive, they get nothing out of me. When someone asks me nicely for something, I will most likely agree.”

It was interesting to get different perspectives on the incident. I can understand why the woman was annoyed if someone was ahead of her in the queue. I did not hear from her directly. She might have been tied up and bundled into the overhead luggage compartment. I hate queue dodgers especially at airports as the plane is not going anywhere until everyone is onboard.

Is two friends standing together any different from a couple standing together? You wouldn’t tell a husband and wife to stand separately or a same sex couple. Posh friends should have the same privileges as two slobs in tracksuits, unless they are wearing red trousers.